The beginning of a new year means one thing – award season is about to heat up. Smaller ceremonies have already begun to separate the wheat from the chaff, but the Golden Globes is the first major ceremony on the way to the Academy Awards. Of course, the Golden Globes is unique since it recognizes achievement in both TV and films and the honorees are selected by a very small group of foreign journalists who often make some very bizarre decisions. The Hollywood Foreign Press Association (HFPA) seem to have settled down in the last few years, but that means that they are probably overdue for some wacky selections. I generally think that the Golden Globes are kind of worthless because of this, but since this is also the award ceremony where everyone gets very drunk, there is the potential for something interesting to happen. Jimmy Fallon is hosting this year, which probably means that the ceremony will be relatively non-controversial compared to previous years, but hopefully he does something fun with it. I’d rather be watching Sherlock, but the work of a blogger is never done.
And away we go……
8:00 – Yay – A La La Land tribute to start.
8:01 – Jimmy and Nicole Kidman – what could have been.
8:02 – That Westworld joke made me laugh
8:02 – Haha…..Jon Snow
8:03 – Eleven shows off her mad rapping skills:
8:03 – Barb lives!
8:04 – The Fallon/Timberlake bromance is still going strong.
8:05 – LOL – the teleprompter is already down…30 seconds into the live show. Let the madness begin.
8:06 – “The Golden Globes – one of the few places left where America still honors the popular vote.”
8:07 – “No one is gonna thank O.J.” Solid point, but the Chris Rock impression was probably ill advised.
8:08 – That King Joffrey/Trump joke didn’t land well. Maybe the audience is still a few seasons behind on Game Of Thrones and are mad Fallon just spoiled that plot point.
8:09 – That Matt Damon/Batman vs Superman quip didn’t work either.
8:09 – I’m surprised that the audience isn’t responding better to these Trump jokes. Though people may think Fallon is overcompensating due to previous criticism about his handling of Trump.
8:09 -Questlove DJing – cut to an old guy that has no idea what is happening
8:09 – Ryan Reynolds and Emma Stone present best supporting actor in a motion picture. I hate that presenters come from the audience.
8:10 Well that is a surprise – Aaron Taylor-Johnson for Nocturnal Animals. Good money should have been on Mahershala Ali for Moonlight. He’ll fare better at the Oscars.
8:11 Wait – this dude is British? How did I not know this?
8:12 Jeffrey Dean Morgan and Priyanka Chopra present best actor in a TV series drama.
8:13 – Billy Bob Thornton will for his Amazon series Goliath. I am now two for two having not seen the performance that has won. I’m a terrible pop culturist.
8:14 – Billy Bob thanks the Foreign Press for letting him beat Bob Odenkirk, who he’s had a feud with “since 1940.”
8:20 – Well that was weird – they announced Hugh Grant as a Golden Globe winner for Florence Foster Jenkins – an award that they haven’t even presented yet. Then Jimmy came out to tell a joke and re-introduced Hugh Grant. That was weird, but the joke was sort of timely “I just got off the phone with Mariah Carey and she thinks Dick Clark productions sabotaged my monologue.”
8:21 – Grant is here to introduce Florence Foster Jenkins, which he doesn’t do particularly well. It’s nominated for best comedy or musical.
8:22 – Drew Barrymore and Timothy Olyphant here to present best actress in a comedy series or musical.
8:23 – Tracee Ellis Ross wins for Black-ish which I also don’t watch (but I’ve heard good things). She’s a first time winner – and the first black woman to win since 1983.
8:25 – So far, hers is the best speech of the night.
8:25 – Olyphant and Barrymore are back to present best comedy series or musical.
8:26 – Hallejuliah! Atlanta wins, which is not only well-deserved, but a show that I watch.
8:27 – Donald Glover’s brown tux is pretty great.
8:27 – Glover gives Migos a shoutout for their song “Bad and Boujee.” They appeared on Atlanta, but I’m guessing this reference confused 50% of the Golden Globes audience. Keep up with your hip hip, people.
8:28 – Wait – we need more of Keith Stanfield dancing!
8:33 – Fallon is back to introduce the president of the Hollywood Foreign Press – the head of one of the most mysterious cabals in Hollywood.
8:34 – Vince Vaughn is here to introduce Hacksaw Ridge, a best picture drama nominee.
8:35 – Nicole Kidman and Reese Witherspoon here to present best lead actress in a limited series or TV movie.
8:36 – Good job Hollywood Foreign Press – that’s two in a row that you got right. Sarah Paulson for her role in American Crime Story: The People vs. OJ Simpson.
8:38 – Kidman and Witherspoon are back to present best limited series or TV movie. I feel like these awards are in a weird order. Like what about lead actor in a limited series?
8:39 – No shocker here – American Crime Story: The People vs OJ Simpson continues its winning streak from the Emmys.
8:45 – And now DJ Julia Louis-Dreyfus on the 1s and 2s.
8:45 – Annette Bening is here to present her film, 20th Century Women, which is in consideration for best picture, musical or comedy.
8:47 – Matt Bomer and Naomi Campbell (weird combo) here to present best supporting actor in a series, limited series or motion picture made for television.
8:48 – The American Crime Story monolpoly comes to an end – Hugh Laurie wins for The Night Manger, which I really enjoyed (but Sterling K. Brown was ROBBED).
8:49 – Solid joke from Laurie – Of course [it’s] more amazing because I’ll be able to say I won this at the last ever Golden Globes.I don’t mean to be gloomy, it’s just that it has the words ‘Hollywood,’ ‘Foreign,’ and ‘Press’ in the title. I also think to some Republicans even the word ‘association’ is sketchy.”
8:50 – Sofia Vergara introduces Miss Golden Globes, the daughters of Sylvester Stallone and Jennifer Flavin. And she once again pokes fun at her accent, which is getting a little old. She shouldn’t have to mock herself all the time.
8:51 – Sting and Carrie Underwood here to introduce the nominees for best original score in a motion picture (after Fallon tried to shoehorn in a Sting impression).
8:52 –Justin Hurwitz wins for La La Land.
8:54 – Sting and Underwood return to present Best Original Song.
8:55 – Another win for La La Land. Sorry Lin-Manuel Miranda.
9:00 – John Legend is here to introduce La La Land. His name was spelled wrong on his nametag. Get it together Golden Globes!
9:02 – Michael Keaton is here to present best supporting actress in a motion picture. If you don’t watch The Tonight Show, you may have thought that Fallon was having a stroke with his intro of Keaton.
9:03 – Even the Hollywood Foreign Press couldn’t mess this one up – the amazing Viola Davis wins for Fences.
9:04 – For real – just give Davis an award for everything she wants. She is perfection.
9:09 – Kristen Bell and Cuba Gooding, Jr. are here to present Best Actress in a limited series. Gooding is yelling a lot, but isn’t yelling “Show me the money” which is progress.
9:10 – Olivia Colman wins for The Night Manager. She isn’t in attendance – I wonder if Jimmy Fallon has the same rules about this as Jimmy Kimmel.
9:10 – Dov Patel and Sunny Pawar. Damn that kid is cute – Patel ain’t so bad either. They are here to introduce Lion.
9:12 – Amy Schumer and Goldie Hawn here to present best actor in a comedy or musical. No one can do ditzy like Hawn, but this material is below her.
9:15 – Ryan Gosling wins for La La Land. He’s just so charming. Losers Ryan Reynolds and Andrew Garfield decide to kiss to console each other.
9:16 – Dear Lord – with the speech he somehow became even more swoon-worthy. How is that even possible?
9:20 – Felicity Jones and Diego Luna present best screenplay. I am told that these are Star Wars people.
9:22 – Another win for La La Land.
9:23 – Kristen Wiig and Steve Carell are here to present best animated film. “Good evening peers and regular people.”
9:25 – Man, the world needs more Steve Carell.
9:26 – This bit is perfection. Straight perfection. Wiig and Carell should host next year. This is the only funny thing that has happened all night.
9:27 – Zootopia wins, which is almost beside the point after that hilarity.
9:34 – Casey Affleck takes the mic to introduce his film Manchester By The Sea.
9:36 – Chris Hemsworth and Gal Gadot present best foreign language film, but more importantly, built a bridge between DC and Marvel.
9:36 – Elle wins and their table had a very delayed reaction to this news.
9:38 – Anna Kendrick and Justin Theroux are here to present best actor in a limited series and to look pretty.
9:40 – The Night Manager continues to pick up awards as Tom Hiddleston wins.
9:42 – His speech pays tribute to the aid workers of the UN Children’s Fund in South Sudan. It’s kind of hard to think what he and Taylor Swift used to talk about.
9:43 – Christian Slater is trying to make heads or tales of this rambling.
9:47 – Jake Gyllenhaal is here to introduce Deadpool for some reason; he’s not in the movie. But more Gyllenhaal is always a good thing. And that’s two Swift exes back to back.
9:48 – LOL – they were very limited on what they could show from Deadpool
9:49 – Laura Dern and Jon Hamm are here to present best actress in a TV series drama. Hamm is rocking a magnificent beard.
9:50 – Claire Foy wins for The Crown, which I am watching on my lunch break at work. It’s great.
9:51 – “The world could do with a few more women at the center of it.” Preach, sister.
9:52 – Hamm and Dern back to present best TV series, drama.
9:52 – The HFPA likes royalty – The Crown wins.
9:54 – DJ Questlove is savage – plays off their speech and then tweets about it:
9:58 – More Viola Davis. This is always a good thing.
9:59 – She’s making me hungry with all this talk of apple pie and collard greens.
10:00 – I had legit no idea where this was going, but Davis is here to present Meryl Streep with the the Cecil B. DeMille Award.
10:01 – Do they give awards for presenting awards?
10:05 – I’m impressed that they snuck a The River Wild clip into this montage.
10:07 – That reaction shot of the audience was a lot of women who lost roles or awards to Streep.
10:09 – Who knew Streep had beef with Mixed Martial Arts?
10:11 – Meryl Wikipedia-ed the hell out of this audience.
10:13 – She ends with a quote from her friend Carrie Fisher: “Take your broken heart. Make it into art.”
10:14 – Great speech – totally on point. (And as expected – Trump tweeted about it).
10:17 – Chris Pratt doing what Chris Pratt does best in the montage of actors talking about their first jobs.
10:19 – Chris Pine is here to present the movie Hell or High Water and enter his beard in the Golden Globes beard contest.
10:21 – Ben Affleck, Sienna Miller and Zoe Saldana here to present Best Director.
10:22 – Another win for La La Land. Let the backlash begin!
10:24 – Mandy Moore and Jess Milo Ventimiglia are here to present best actor in a comedy or musical series. I am not digging the stache.
10:25 – Another great win for Donald Glover.
10:27 – He has a kid? This is news to me.
10:31 – Matt Damon is presenting best actress for motion picture in a musical or comedy and pokes fun at his win for The Martian last year. “That fact alone is funnier than literally anything in The Martian.”
10:33 – Emma Stone wins for La La Land, which is actually deserved.
10:35 – Pierce Brosnon is here to introduce Sing Street. This is on my list to see. I’m guessing it will be right up my alley.
10:41 – Brad Pitt gets a nice ovation in one of his first appearances since the end of Brangelina. He’s here to introduce Moonlight, which is a beautiful movie and should have won more awards.
10:42 – Jessica Chastain and Eddie Redmayne get a rapping intro from Fallon. They are here to award the best motion picture, musical or comedy. This shouldn’t be a surprise based on all the previous awards. And Fallon is trying a little too hard.
10:43 – Yup – as expected. La La Land sweeps.
10:44 – Fun fact – La La Land was originally supposed to star Miles Teller and Emma Watson. I cannot even imagine what Teller would have looked like in that role.
10:50 – Brie Larson presents Best Actor in a motion picture.
10:50 – Casey Affleck wins for his powerful performance in Manchester By The Sea.
10:51 – I love that Busy Phillips is always Michelle Williams’ date. They are so adorable.
10:57 – Leonardo DiCaprio is here to present best actress in a motion picture. He’s been suspiciously low profile tonight.
10:58 – Huh. Isabelle Huppert wins for Elle. I thought Natalie Portman had this in the bag. But the trailer for Elle did look good, so maybe the HFPA knows what they are doing.
11:00 – Carl Weathers and Sylvester Stallone (?) are here to present Best Picture Drama. It’s the 40th anniversary of Rocky, but that still seems like a stretch.
11:01 – Hot damn! It’s Moonlight! Nice work Hollywood Foreign Press Association.
11:03 – And…..it’s over. Thank the gods, old and new, for that.
The Golden Globes went pretty much as expected tonight, with a few minor surprises thrown in to keep things moderately interesting. I liked Fallon’s cold open, but the rest of his material didn’t really work. He just never hit the right tone and leaned a little too much on stuff that works on his late night show. He wasn’t a disaster, but I didn’t miss him when he was off stage. I still think Amy Poehler and Tina Fey were the best hosts in recent years and Fallon did nothing to challenge that. I never love the Golden Globes, but it is a good warm-up for the marathon that is award season. It’s hard to read too much into the results, but I’ve been predicting a Moonlight/La La Land showdown at the Oscars and they did both win the big award in their respective categories. So I guess we’ll see if La La Land can keep up the momentum or if it loses steam.